Here I go again.

If blogs were women, I would be a chronic dater. The psychological profile is simple: a man who searches externally for that sense of wholeness which can be born only within, a man who identifies with external objects to conceive a stable, permanent sense of self. My writing has served not just to express thoughts, but also to validate my identity. This backwards mode of thinking—identifying with an expression rather than expressing an identity—has led to a number of infidelities. I’ve finally realized, however, that I prefer returning home each night to a blog that is complex and imperfect over carousing for flashy concepts and jumping from one themed blog to the next.

To that end, this first post shall offer no prescriptions for what will follow. When I write to fit a theme, I lose interest. So the theme will emerge out of what I write. Fittingly, then, I have christened this blog with my pen name to emphasize this identity/expression connection.

I have always felt that my identity has rested upon a sense that I am somehow on a quest—and that I will need to share that which I find. Discoveries have rarely felt like anything more than stepping stones, and explaining them has been difficult except in the presence of other seekers. This may stink of arrogance, but elitism has no place here. A seeker wears only the crown of loneliness, which weighs heavy as the journey takes him further from the familiar domain.

I write to understand my journey and to connect with others who must also roam. And I write to bridge with the denizens of convention whom I so envy—those whose minds are not thrall to the idealism which frequently paralyzes me. We all have our parts in this story. I was born to wander the forest and behold mysteries. I do not lament this, but the quest is idle pending a homecoming. To that end, this blog will help me learn how to express myself in a way that is accessible.

I conclude this inaugural post with a quote from the essay that first called me into the woods:

Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, the connection of events. Great men have always done so, and confided themselves childlike to the genius of their age, betraying their perception that the absolutely trustworthy was seated at their heart, working through their hands, predominating in all their being. And we are now men, and must accept in the highest mind the same transcendent destiny; and not minors and invalids in a protected corner, not cowards fleeing before a revolution, but guides, redeemers, and benefactors, obeying the Almighty effort, and advancing on Chaos and the Dark.